Back to YOU

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Dear Jesus,

Hi. And so You have once again proved that I can never outsmart You. How thoughtless am I to think that I could do it my way, for the nth time. It’s been a tiring journey (away from You) and I am here again, dusting off as John Mayer’s song plays in my head:

Back to You
It always comes around
Back to You
I tried to forget You
I tried to stay away
But it’s too late

Over You
I’m never over
Over You
It’s something about You
It’s just the way You move
The way You move me

Yeah, I’m so good at forgetting
And I quit every game I play
But forgive me, Lord
I can’t turn and walk away this way…

I hope this is the last time I would have to relearn all these lessons. How dare I think that I could live away from Your peace. *Sigh* I can get really REALLY stubborn and stupid (sometimes) most of the time. So here we are again, restoring the relationship I built with You, reviving the Spirit that leads to Your way, and rekindling the right kind of love. Oh, was there a wrong kind? How do you call a love driven by impatience and selfishness? Oops, it wasn’t love, it’s SIN packaged and wrapped differently, but birthed the same-old-same-old poison in me. I’m sorry for breaking Your heart over and over and over again. Forgive me.

Please get me to a point wherein I will be so much delighted and satisfied in Your presence that I will forget worrying about the desires I have that I plotted in my own timeline. Please remove all the filthy and worthless ideas that are combating with the pleasing path You are leading me to. Please put to death my insecurities, my anxious thoughts, the pain of the past, and the fear of the future. I want to do this right. I want to live life Your way. Right now, every single day of my life.

Thank you for all the faith-stretching experiences, and for the season of pruning. Thank you for not tolerating my impulsive, unfair and shortcut decisions. Thank you for the Holy guilt, the Holy pain you allowed me to feel for me to finally realize that I was taking the direction away from You. Thank you for placing people in my life who didn’t judge and condemn me. Instead, they interceded that I may be here again, back to You.

I love you.

I’m sorry.

Again, I’m all Yours now.

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Love,

Your Stubborn Princess

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2 thoughts on “Back to YOU

  1. Beautiful. It’s amazing the love God has for us! So happy you found your way back to Him! I myself have a journey similar to yours and Wow am I sold out to live for Him! No turning back! Blessings and continue to renew your mind in Him. Keep fighting the fight when life throws the curveballs. You can do this!

    Liked by 1 person

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