To All The Men I Thought I Loved Before


This is spontaneous writing. Just in case you thought of checking out how I am now. I’m doing alright. This goes to you, to all of you that I said “I love you too” back in the days, I think I didn’t really mean any of it. I just liked the idea of having someone to say the big words to. I’d just throw it away without really meaning ’em. Forgive me, I was hopeless romantic. I was selfish and conceited. I’m sorry in every and any way I hurt you, in case I did. And to the ones I purposefully hurt and cheated on, I’m sorry for stepping on your ego. I’m sorry if I distorted the idea of love in your pov. I’ve also forgiven you for hurting me. I don’t want any bitterness and hurt living in my mind and my chest, I don’t want to live confused about the real essence of love. I sincerely want you all to live in joy and peace, with whoever you are with or wherever path the Lord leads you to. I’m sorry for telling you promises I didn’t mean. Or maybe I meant them, but I broke them. I’m posting this because I want to be free from any pain of the past, cause I want to be ready for the right one. I believe there’s true love right there for all of us. And we’ll only be found by it in humility, gentleness and kindness. I don’t know when mine’s coming but I sincerely believe I gotta do this today. I want to be ready for my God’s Best and it includes freeing myself from all pain. Again, I am truly sorry. May Jesus reign in your hearts.

Sissel Ria


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